May 8, 2010

Thoughts on mothering my son

It is no secret that I wasn't thrilled about having a boy. Not that I was against's just that I didn't know anything about them! I have two sisters, and no brothers, and therefore did not grow up with boy. I was a bit apprehensive. When I found out in the ultrasound that I was having a boy, I cried. As my due date approached, however, I got very excited. I fell in love immediately with D, literally one second after I saw him. He was perfect: healthy, beautiful, and mine. All my fears about boys melted away when I held him for the first time.

Therefore, D has taught me about the magic world of boys.

D is very much like me in so many ways. We are both bookworms, love music, like to find out about people, even look alike in several features. But personality-wise, he is even more like me. He loves to sleep, and like me when I was a child, practically needs a bulldozer to get him out of bed in the morning. He is stubborn, and we constantly clash and butt heads. We both like to own collections of things, whether it's every Star Wars item he sees or every book in a series I love. And he has a long memory, which is definitely inherited from my side of the family.

Therefore, D has taught me that I need to look within myself to get the best out of him.

D has a curiosity and thirst for knowledge. He wants to try everything. I remember when he was in preschool, and they offered optional enrichment classes after school. He did a session of soccer, and a session of karate. For the third session, he wanted to do ballet. Not because he wanted to actually LEARN ballet, mind you, but because it was something he hadn't tried yet (he ended up doing soccer again when he learned he'd be the only boy in the class). He really gets into his books, and reads them in the car because he can't put it down. He constantly asks questions that I can't answer and need to look up.

Therefore, D has reminded me about how fun it is to learn for the sheer joy of it.

Pre-children, I never went to temple, and hardly did anything religious. Now, we have Shabbat dinner every single Friday night, with challah that I bake myself, and we try to celebrate all the other Jewish holidays (at least the major ones) as well. We're even working on maybe getting to temple a bit more often.

Therefore, D has brought me back to my religious roots.

Before D was born, I had a fancy-free life. Since I was working, and therefore we were a two-income family, we had a lot more money and therefore traveled a lot more, ate out often, and did fun things such as buying season tickets to see Broadway musicals. After D was born, I stayed home with him, and money got tighter. Travel is rare, I cook most nights. and getting a pedicure is a luxury I used to take for granted. In return, I get family time, home-cooked meals, kisses and cuddles from my son, pictures drawn and stories made up just for me, and the satisfaction of knowing that above anyone else, I have the most impact on molding this young boy into the wonderful man I hope he becomes.

Therefore, D has taught me selflessness, boundless joy, and unconditional love.

I love my son, with all my heart, and am so proud and honored to be his mama.

1 comment:

  1. D has taught me that I need to look within myself to get the best out of him.

    That is such a powerful statement and so very very true. Our children reflect so much of ourselves, be it good, bad or ugly. To really get them ticking we have to look at what makes us tick.


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