I am an addict.
No, I'm not addicted to alcohol. I rarely drink, maybe 1-2 drinks a month maximum. And I don't do drugs, smoke cigarettes, or gamble.
I'm addicted to caffeine. And I hate it.
It never used to be like this. I can remember a time, not that long ago, that I would go to Starbucks and order a Spiced Apple Cider, which is a non-caffeinated drink. I would certainly drink caffeine, of course...a soda a few days a week...but it was nothing serious.
Then I discovered coffee. The gateway.
Now, I need a cup of coffee every morning. I usually brew it myself at home, in order to save money, but if I feel like treating myself I go to Starbucks. A Tall or Grande size won't do it for me...I need the Venti. Once in a while, if I've had a long night being up with A, I'll even order a double-shot.
And don't even get me started on my soda intake! Those of you health nuts who are reading this will cringe, but I need about 2 Diet Cokes a day (in addition to my morning coffee) to get me through. These days I buy the kind with vitamins and minerals, to fool myself into thinking it's healthier. Ha ha.
If I don't get my daily caffeine, I am grouchy, tired, and worst of all get a withdrawal headache. That's how I know I'm addicted...it's the withdrawal symptoms.
I don't like being addicted to caffeine...but don't know how to stop. As a busy mom, especially being a mother to a daughter with so many needs, I don't have time to spend a few days nursing a terrible headache. I get unsolicited migraines as it is; I don't want to volunteer for killer headaches. I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place....wanting to quit but not having the strength too.
Maybe I should look into ways of weaning myself off. I'm not against caffeine per se...it has it's time and place. It's the needing I can do without...I don't have a choice in the matter anymore, and I want my choice back.
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I hear you. I didn't like being hooked on the drug either. If you really want to wean yourself off I'd start with the sodas, drop one of those and move on from there. The morning cup of jo is not a problem, you know that. Moderate use of caffiene is not a problem. Honestly though, after going through the detox myself, I can tell you it isn't as bad as you think it will be. I was dreading it. I was drinking two cups of coffee every morning, plus a diet coke and often an energy drink before my afternoon work out and sometimes a latte for good measure. I'm down to one cup of green tea with caffiene and a ton of decaf tea. I think upping my water and tea intake really helped with my withdrawl headache. I have more energy now than I did when I was downing the hard stuff. Good luck friend!
ReplyDeleteChad was like you with the headache withdrawals. He cut down the Coke to 1 a day and took ibuprofen for the headaches. He is now officially free from the Cokes. He drinks one coffee a day and that is it. You can do it and I think the first day will be the hardest and each day will get better.
ReplyDeleteOoh, normally I would cut you some slack here but that is a lot of caffeine. And the soda really does make me cringe! One of the worst things you can put in your body is soda so for your health alone I hope you can at least get that out of your regimen. Nothing wrong w/ a cup a day but this actually worries me because it worries you for one thing. But there are lots of other things w/ caffeine that are better for you. Get a big box of Irish Breakfast Tea. It is wonderful w/ honey and some cream. It is all about baby steps here. Cut back a little bit every week. Write down your goals. Limit Starbucks to a weekend morning out. I don't want this to be such a crutch for you and it doesn't need be. Take some baby steps now for your health. And you peace of mind where this is concerned. You know you will have support the whole way.
ReplyDeleteI hate tea, so that is out. But you are totally right, the soda is terrible for me. I must decrease it!
ReplyDeleteAnd Krista, you are totally inspiring!
ReplyDeletedo you like mineral water? If you do pour a glass and add a splash of pomegranate juice, it's a great soda alternative.
ReplyDelete